Memory
by FlOrangey
Summary: What's the point in keeping a journal if you're just going to forget everything?


The entire room was white. Everything in the room was white - the walls, the floor, the ceiling – just white. No color, just blank walls. Where was he? In a room. Four walls. One floor. One ceiling. He was on something hard, but something soft on him.

"He's awake!"

A voice. A voice…calling about someone. Him? Maybe. Probably.

He blinked as he heard a noise. Footsteps. He blinked and the next thing he saw was a person – a woman – hovering over him. Her face looking…relieved.

"Rex, thank goodness you're alright."

Rex…something about that word sounded familiar. He stayed silent, staring at the ceiling trying to think, but his mind was a blank. "Rex?" The person spoke again and he looked at her.

"Who are you?"

* * *

"This isn't good."

Another person was in the room. The woman had left him and was talking to this person, a man in a green suit. Rex stared at the man for a moment eyeing the suit. It looked very familiar; he had a feeling that if he would look good in it if he took one.

"If White Knight finds out about this-"

"He won't." The woman interrupted, "We both know what White Knight will do if he finds out about this, so no one will say anything. Understood."

White Knight? The name was drawing a blank, but Rex couldn't keep his hands from shaking when he heard that name. He glanced back up at the woman and man who were looking at him. He looked down to the floor as he heard the woman speak up again. "I just can't believe this happened. We knew it could happen eventually, but…"

"You were hoping not this soon."

The woman nodded a feeling of dread washing over her. She took a deep breath reminding herself to keep calm during this kind of situation. They had planned for this, they could handle everything. "Call Noah," She said, "maybe he can help Rex."

The man nodded and left and the woman made her way over to him. Rex glanced up for a second before staring back at the white floor.

"Rex?" She said and he felt her hand on his shoulder. He looked up at her to see a smile on her face, but her hand was shaking a little. "Everything's going to be fine." She said, her voice calm, easy. "We knew this would happen eventually."

"Who are you?" He asked. The woman took a deep breath.

"You can just call me Doctor Holiday." She told him.

"Doctor Holiday." He repeated. "And I'm?"

"Rex."

"…Rex?"

"Yes."

Rex…the name sounded right. He looked around the room; the bright and blank white room was starting to make him feel uneasy. "Why am I here?"

"You had an accident out on the field." The woman – Doctor Holiday– said as he gazed at the walls, probably only half listening. "You received some serious injuries and… lost your memory."

"Where are we?" He asked looking at her.

"We're at Providence."

"Providence?"

Doctor Holiday nodded before saying; "It's hard to explain, but it's like this…" she began trying to explain to Rex about Providence. About the he job, the Nanites and the EVO. As Holiday explained it all to him, Rex found himself rubbing his forehead.

"I'm sorry…" He said when she finished. "But I don't understand."

Doctor Holiday gave him a sad smile squeezing his shoulder, "It's alright. It's a lot to understand, so it's going to take time."

"How long?" The teenager asked and Holiday only gave him a sad look.

"That I don't know."

* * *

Rex had followed Doctor Holiday down the white halls of the Providence building to his room. The whole building was either white or grey, and he shivered as they walked down some colder areas. She brought him to a room that was more of a white and red color.

She said it was his room. He looked around and couldn't help but notice that it was very plain. Few books, some movies, a pair of headphones were on the bed. A monkey in a makeshift blanket that was hung up like a hammock… he stopped and relooked at the monkey that was now looking at him. Why was there a monkey in his room and why was it wearing an eye patch?

"What are you staring at?"

He blinked and looked at Doctor Holiday. "Did that Monkey just talk?"

"Rex that is Bobo, you're pet."

"Pet?" The monkey yelled jumping out of the sheets. "Who you callin' a pet?" He asked before turning his attention to Rex. "Don't listen to her, I'm not your pet I'm your partner, there's a difference."

Rex didn't say anything, not quite sure how to respond to the prescience of a talking monkey. The monkey however sighed and shook his head "Ah forget it, I heard what happened to you kid. Sorry." He said, "Names Bobo, I've been hanging around here as your buddy for awhile, but I suppose you don't remember that anymore."

"N-not ringing any bells." Rex said, still not sure how to react to the monkey's prescience, or the fact it could talk.

"Bobo, Rex's journal?"

"I got it, I got it." Bobo said climbing back up into the hammock. "It's right here. No offence kid, but it's pretty obvious you put all of your personal belongings in your sock draw."

"My what?" Rex asked, before feeling something hard hit his head. "Ow!"

"Oops, sorry." Bobo said chuckling. "I don't suppose that hit jogged anything did it."

"N-no…" Rex stammered rubbing the back of his head.

"Ah, didn't think so." The monkey said, the disappointed tone made Rex glance at the monkey again before picking the thing he tossed up off the floor. It was a book, to be more precise, a journal.

His name was written on it.

* * *

"Ring any bells yet?" Bobo asked.

He shook his head. The words on the paper weren't connecting with him. Some he couldn't even read.

"What about these?" Another person said, handing him some pictures. The person called himself Noah and he said that he was Rex's best friend. He probably was. Maybe.

Rex took a photo and looked at it. It was him, Noah and two girls in dresses. He was in a green suit. Seeing himself he couldn't help but grin. "I look good."

"If you say so…" Was Noah's only comment as he watched Rex look at the photo. Aside from the comment on his outfit of choice, Rex remained silent. "Well anything?"

Rex continued to stare at the photo. Himself, Noah, and two girls in nice dresses. Him in a suit. He frowned; something was telling him that something big had happened the night this picture was taken. Whatever it was though wasn't coming to him. "Nothing." He said and gave the photo back to Noah. He relooked at the journal and some of the strange words.

"I can't read some of these words."

"What ones?"

"Like this." He pointed to one of them. 'Hhasste-a lugo?'"

"That's 'Hasta Luego.'" Noah told him, only to receive a blank star in return. "It's Spanish. You used to speak it all the time."

"I did?"

"Yeah. Hasta Manana, Lo Siento, Gracias. You said it all the time?"

Again Rex's expression was blank. "What do all those mean?"

Noah sighed, and shook his head. If Rex had forgotten his attempts to learn Spanish then they had a lot of work ahead of him. "They mean 'see you tomorrow,' 'I'm sorry,' 'Thank you,' Remember?"

Rex didn't answer and stared at the words, the 'Spanish' written on the paper. He couldn't read them, but they seemed so familiar and from what Noah told him he should be able to read them. No matter how long he stared though nothing was coming to him. "No I don't." He finally said, his grip on the journal tightening. It relaxed when he felt Noah put a hand on his shoulder.

"Hey it's alright." Noah said getting a side glance from Rex, "I'm guessing that stuff like this takes time. Just read up about yourself and maybe something will eventually come to you and everything else will follow."

Rex nodded. It sounded so easy, but something told him it would not be that easy.

* * *

_Okay, this is weird. I mean a written journal? Well Agent Six is pretty old school, and he says that I have a better chance of not losing it. Yeah, I kinda doubt that._

_So, what to start with? Well I guess I could start with how I joined Province. …On second thought never mind, don't really remember that. Just kinda woke up there and few weeks later started training and figuring out my powers. Gotta say figuring out that I could change parts of my body into machines was pretty cool, specially the right arm becoming a huge sword. Sweeeet._

_Hmm, guess we could start with my first mission…or maybe when Bobo became my pet (oh sorry, I mean partner)…or how about when I first met Noah? Ah Dios _("A Dye-os?") _there's so much to cover._

_Well, guess I might as well get to the point: If you are reading this, it's most likely because you either a) got really bored because Noah's in school and Providence won't let you out on the town because Agent Six is still mad that you stole one of his suits for that one date -I mean, dude has like six other suits exactly like it, why's he gonna miss one? – or b) something happened that made you lose your memory._

_Considering every time I write in this I hope I never have to open it again, I'm going to assume B._

_

* * *

_

"So, I'm an EVO?"

"Yes." Holiday said as she continued to look through her microscope. Rex had come in and started asking questions; not that she minded, the fact he was asking questions about himself meant that hopefully his memory would return faster. Hopefully was the key word; they still didn't know what was causing Rex's blackouts or how long they were going on for, or if there was even a way to stop them.

For all she knew he might never regain his memory.

"And I fight other EVOs?" He asked again. Holiday gave a small nod before asking another question. "Why?"

"Because…" Doctor Holiday started, but then trailed off. The answer to that question was simple, but wording it in a way that wouldn't give the boy the wrong idea was another matter altogether. How did they explain it to him the first time? That had been months ago, so she didn't quite remember. She looked up and saw the uneasy look Rex was giving her and decided that she had better give the best answer now and clarify anything to him later. "Most EVOs are dangerous, so we need to get rid of them by any means. The preferred method is to cure them."

"Cure them?" Rex asked seeming confused.

"Yes, that's you're job." Holiday started and continued as the look on Rex's face changed to full blown confusion. "You're EVO abilities focus on machines and as a side effect you have the ability to cure other EVOs; return them to 'normal' I guess you could say."

"So my job is to make dangerous EVO's no longer dangerous."

"Essentially." Holiday said. There was a silence as Rex looked like he was processing the information. His job here was to cure EVOs. Most EVOs were dangerous.

"Was I ever dangerous?" He asked. Holiday stiffened at hearing the question before taking a deep breath.

"To be honest I don't know." She told him. "When you were brought to Providence you had didn't have any memories."

"This has happened before?"

"Yes… And from what we learned, it's been happening for awhile." She said and bit her lip when she saw Rex's eyes widen.

"It has?" He asked. Holiday nodded prompting Rex's next question. "Why?"

"The only thing we know is that it seems to be some kind of condition you have." She told him, "But we don't know what causes it; we can only guess that it's from some kind of traumatic experience, or it could be some kind of side-effect of your powers. I- _we_ don't know."

Rex fell silent. He had no more questions. Not now anyway, it didn't seem like Holiday was going to have any answers for him either. He looked around the lab, at the machine in the back, at Holiday's desk, the notes on the paper and the microscope she was looking through. It was as if this place was some kind of lab. And he was the lab rat.

* * *

_So…my first official mission with Providence. Ah man, that one's going to be hard to forget. First major mission, first time I had been let out of Providence and into the city. Stopped the EVO and cured him…got hugged by the middle aged naked old guy I had cured. That was…Ugh… Voy a tener nauseas._

_And then there was the mission in New York with that EVO that turned everyone into zombies (I'm only including this because Bobo will be asking about it). I think that was the first time that Providences 'Cure, Contain, Kill' policy hit me. I mean White Knight was willing to risk all those innocent people just to kill one EVO. Yeah he was a threat, but would that have really been necessary? I don't think so._

_Ugh…guy keeps talking about how if I can't do my job I'm going to be taken out. Well I doubt that'll happen, and you don't have to worry about that either if your reading this with that shocked and horrified look I bet you have on your face. Holiday and Six will not let that happen, neither will Noah. You can trust them, trust me, I'm you and you know you can._

_Besides with what you can do, he's got more of a reason to be afraid of you than you of him._

_

* * *

_

"You look exhausted." Doctor Holiday said as she examined Rex's eyes the next day.

"I didn't sleep that well." He said trying to stay as relaxed as possible. Holiday had told him to stay relaxed and not blink, but that was hard with the light shining into his eye.

"I guess that's understandable, Providence doesn't have a very welcoming environment." Holiday told him, a grin on her face as she moved the instrument away from him his face and put it back on the desk. She picked up a clipboard and began writing something on paper. "Well physically, you're doing okay fine. Most minor injuries are healed and you should be back to form in a few days." She finished and put the clipboard on the table. Rex looked at the floor and then to Holiday.

"Doctor Holiday can I ask you something?"

"Of course." She said.

"Who is White Knight?"

She stopped, that was something she was hoping to cover at another time. "Why?"

"I was reading my journal last night and it mentioned someone named White Knight would 'take me out' if I couldn't do my job."

Holiday bit her lip upon hearing this; she had been hoping to bring up White Knight at a later time. "White Knight is my boss. I guess you could say he's your boss as well. In a way he's the founder of Providence."

"And why will he 'take me out' if I can't do my job?"

Doctor Holiday closed her eyes leaned against the desk, her silence making Rex fidget uncomfortable. After a few seconds she opened them again a sad look on her face. "Rex, I'm not sure how to say this lightly, so I'm just going to be honest with you." She said. Rex hesitated before giving a quick. "White Knight sees you as a weapon that can be disposed of it rendered unusable."

"What?" The boy cried out. "A weapon?"

"Rex calm down." Holiday said straightening. This was a bad idea; "White Knight can't touch you. He has made this threat before, but he keeps himself in a sterile room so he expects us to comply with his commands."

Hearing this Rex fell silent, gazing down at the floor before looking up at Holiday. "Will you?"

Holiday shook her head. "No." She said, "Unlike White Knight, Agent Six and I don't consider you a weapon. We won't let him do anything to you."

"You won't?" He asked. Holiday gave him a smile.

"I promise as long as Agent Six, me, and Noah are here, nothing will happen to you." She said. Rex looked down at the ground quiet; just like his journal said, Holiday and Agent Six wouldn't let anything happen to him as long as they were here. At least he could trust himself.

* * *

"I think I should probably just say this now, and get it out of the way." Noah said getting Rex's attention.

"What is it?" He asked. The young man had been staring down at the petting zoo. Bobo had said there was an exit down there to get out of Providence, and a part of him was tempted to go down there and find it. The only things that were keeping him from trying were that he wasn't quite sure how to get in there and he promised Holiday that he wouldn't try anything. Instead he watched as an EVO plant strangled a mutated ant eater. "Oh that's creepy."

"Yeah it is." Noah said giving a small shudder at the sight. "Anyway, I heard that you were asking about White Knight, so I figured I might as well just tell you this now so you don't need to worry about it later."

"What?" Rex asked.

"When we first met, I was working for Knight." Noah explained. "He-"

"Paid you to keep an eye on me." Rex cut him off leaving the teenager to stare at him with his mouth open.

"Y-yeah. How did you-" Again Rex cut him off, only instead of saying anything he simply held up the brown colored journal. "Oh. Guess I shouldn't be surprised that you would write that down." Noah gave a nervous laugh, "Well I guess there really isn't much more I can say."

"Are you still working for him?" Rex asked.

"Nah, I quit after all that happened." Noah told him before falling silent and then adding, "Actually I didn't exactly quit, I got fired." Another pause before adding, "And if I was still working for him we probably wouldn't be hanging out with each other."

"Sounded like I was pretty mad."

"Pretty mad? Rex, you were so frustrated your powers stopped working. We almost got killed by a giant EVO spider thing." Noah told him before shrugging. "But that's water over the bridge; we're still pals."

"I guess…" Rex said getting a look from Noah.

"You guess?" The blonde asked, "Dude, what happened happened, and we're both cool."

"Would you and I have become friends if you hadn't been paid to watch me?"

"What?" Noah cried out taken back. He opened his mouth to retort, wanting to say that they would have become friends regardless. Of course when he stopped to think about it, "No, no I guess not." He said, "But, that doesn't really matter now does it? I mean we're friends now and it's not like I'm still working for the guy."

Rex shrugged and Noah fell silent back to watching the EVOs in the petting zoo. After a minute Rex spoke up again, "I'm guessing you took the job I didn't scare you."

"Huh?"

"Holiday told me that most EVOs when they mutate are dangerous." He said and turned to Noah, "I'm guessing that you took the job because you were told I wasn't."

"Uh…" Noah started trailing off and biting his lip. "I guess that might have had something to do with it." He said catching a glance at Rex's downcast look. "Why are you hung up on this anyway? I mean you weren't after everything that happened."

"I guess…" Rex started, but stopped and sighed, "I dunno. I guess I'm just confused. I've been hearing a lot from you, Holiday, and that journal I wrote and…I dunno." He said watching the plant EVO finishing devouring its prey and start hunting for more prey. He couldn't help but feel that he was just like that thing in there. "Maybe I was dangerous at one point." He spoke up. "Holiday told me that I had lost my memory before I joined Providence, maybe I was a threat back then."

"Does it matter?"

"I dunno…" And with that Rex fell silent.

* * *

_So if you're wondering by now why this journal only covers my time at Providence, it's because it's all I remember. I don't remember anything about my life before joining Providence and the first couple of weeks are also a bit of a blur. I don't even remember how I discovered my powers or how Holiday and Agent Six learned about my ability to cure other EVOs._

_I did learn something recently. On a mission in Hong Kong I had to stop a bunch of EVOs that were robbing a bank, which would have been pretty boring if one of the EVOs there (Tuck, guy with bandages in case you ever meet him) hadn't claimed to have known me. The thing that caught my interest was when he said 'you had another one of your blackouts' or something like that. Now that was confusing and I knew I needed to find something out._

_Next thing I know, I'm hanging out with his partners Skwydd and Cricket (ella es mona), and I found out that not only did I know these people I WAS THERE LEADER! Seriously, I am not making this up, I knew these guys before Providence. Thing is while they remembered me I didn't remember them… but hanging out with them just seemed, I dunno, it just seemed right._

_The whole mission pretty much had my head spinning. Those guys are nice guys and I will miss them, so I can't believe that when I hung out with them, I was working under their noses and selling them out to a guy named Quarry. I couldn't believe it, but I had to, listening to myself actually say all that pretty much brought it all into my head. But just because I was like that before didn't mean I was like that now; I ran in there and broke them out; got Quary arrested by Providence. As for them, they're still in Hong Kong hiding out, but I think it's safe to say they won't be a problem. Not because they gave me their word, just a feeling._

_I kinda wonder if I'll ever meet them again, and if I do, if I'll still remember them. Doctor Holiday says my condition is chronic and might be related to some kind of trauma caused during the nanite explosion. That's why they gave me this journal, so I could write everything down in case something happens._

_Which is why you're reading this now, right?_

_

* * *

_

"What's the point of me keeping a journal if I'm just going to keep forgetting everything?"

"So that you can read about your life and have an idea of who you are. Or who you once were." Hearing Holiday's voice over the loudspeaker made him look up at the small windows several feet above him. It reminded him of why he was in the large room; training. No memory meant no idea how to use his powers so he had to relearn those along with relearning about his life. "You ready Rex?" He heard Holiday ask.

"Yeah…" Rex muttered as he stared at the panel in front of him attached to some lights. He was supposed to manipulate it with his nanites. "You sure I can do this Doctor Holiday?"

"Trust me Rex, just close your eyes and focus on the machine." She said. He looked at it again, it looked ordinary enough; just a white panel that had a bunch of stuff on it that he couldn't read. Simple. Not really.

Still he had to give it a try. He put his hand on the panel and closed his eyes. Concentrate on the machine… he thought, but how that was going to help him figure out his powers he had no idea.

At least that's what he thought before hearing something. A voice, a tiny voice in his head whispering something he couldn't quite make out, but at the same time understood completely. _Systems activated: command: prompt… activate._

Rex opened his eyes to see the panel light up and then one of the lights, a blue one, turn on. "Did I do that?"

"Great job Rex." He heard Holiday say, and it was clear she was trying hard to hide her excitement. "Now try turning that light off and one of the others on."

Rex gave a small nod and concentrated on the panel again. This power, this ability to control a machine; it felt strange, but at the same time it felt right. He could hear the voice in his head again and when he opened his eyes he could see the blue light turn off and another one – a white one – turn on. Rex gave a smile and looked up to where Holiday was. "What else can I do?"

He could hear her trying not to laugh. "Easy there Rex, let's take things one step at a time."

* * *

_Look I'm pretty sure that all of this is pretty confusing for you and what not, but over time everything's going to make sense and you'll get used to life at Providence. You'll get used to Agent Six always hounding you and hunting you down for stealing his green suits when you have to go undercover. You'll get used to White Knights empty threats (empty to you anyway), and you'll get used to Noah always beating you at basketball and you having to sometimes sneak out to hang out with him. You'll get used to Bobo being a talking monkey and that feeling you get whenever Doctor Holiday's around? Yeah you'll get used to that too._

_I know it's going to be frustrating, reading about this, reading about your life and having to readjust to everything over and over again, but this life, the life Providence gives you, it's actually pretty good. The first few weeks will be hard, training to relearn how to use your abilities will be a nightmare, but things get easier from there. Providence will send you out on missions, and you'll be given a bit more freedom, like being allowed to head to the city Noah lives in. Alright it doesn't really get better than that, but it's better than being locked up in a small room all day._

_You just can't give up. And you won't, I know you won't, because I am you._

_And I'd be embarrassed if I saw myself give up, like really embarrassed. You wanna embarrass yourself in front of yourself? No!_

_Everything'll be fine; as Agent Six says, 'you just gotta live.' Oh and when you go out on missions, don't forget about your goggles. Trust me; those things are handy in flight._

_

* * *

_

Rex read the last line of the journal and closed the book. The sound of knocking came from his door. "Come in." He said and the door opened, Doctor Holiday was standing in the hallway.

"Rex, are you ready?" She asked, "I know it's quite sudden to send you on this mission but –"

Holiday didn't have to finish her question. Rex put the journal on the bed and got up, grabbing his goggles that were hanging on off it.

"Yeah, I'm ready." He said and put the goggles on. Holiday gave him a small smile as he left the room and closed the door behind him.

_End_

**Author's Note: **After seeing the episode _Rabble_, ideas about Rex's apparent chronic memory loss popped into my head and I wanted to write something that focused on it. The idea of something happening to cause his memory loss and Rex confiding in his journal and the people around him appealed to me the most so I decided to focus on that. In a way this is an AU because it happens as sort of a 'what if Rex lost his memory while working for Providence' idea.

I originally had the idea of there being more dialogue than description to try and convey a sort of 'out of body experience,' but I found myself having trouble keeping track of who was saying what so I ditched it for a more conventional style. In the end I still think it came out pretty well, but the beginning I think still shows what I was going for. Only reason I didn't change it was because I got tired of working on this. I planned to have this done before Hunter came out last Friday, but because of school it took longer to get done.

Rex's journal entries were the easiest for me; the characters personality really rubs off on me and I like characters like him that have a flare to them. I tried to capture Rex's personality as it is in the show through the journal entries and I think it turned out alright. Outside of the entries I wanted to go with a bitterer, somewhat uneasy approach while still keeping Rex as Rex, but I don't think it really worked out. I also can't say I like how I ended this, seems a bit poorly paced but I couldn't think of anything else to do with it. Yeah...

Well guess that's everything I need to say about this thing. I enjoyed writing this and if you guys like it I'll probably do more writing for Generator Rex if I have the time.

Orangey


End file.
